Head Start Program
May 15, 2008
1. Introduction:
2 Request Input from group
3 Major concepts for this evening
A.) Begin with the end in mind
B.) Give up perfection
C.) Take care of yourself
Begin with the end in mind;What kind of adult would you like your child to be when he or she grows up? What values do you want yhour child to have? Parents are the first and most influential teachers a child will ever have. As parents we need to set the example for our children. For the most part, our children will follow in our footsteps. That is not to say they will become our clones, but they will fall back on the enprinting that we supply in early childhood, unless we make a concerted effort to not do so. How many times have you heard your mother’s voice coming from your mouth?
If you want your child to value your spiritual foundation, your child needs to be exposed to it very early on through adolescents. As a young adult they may choose to take another path, but your job is to ensure they know your tradidtion and faith. If you want your child to value reading and education, you have to value reading and education. Read to your child, have books around. Read and study yourself. If you want your child to be generous, be generous and expose your child to your generosity. List your top values, challenge yourself…are you living your life to those values? If you are living your values and priorities your children will see them and will learn them. Then they will become teenagers….you will become stupid….everything you do will be challenged and then….they grow up. Once again you will become the font of wisdom and they will start to return to all of the things you exposed them to when they were young children. Even if they do not choose to follow your example, your job is to provide it.
Give up perfectionism; Perfection is highly over rated and because it is perfect, it can rarely be achieved and often the cost is way too much! Give it up for yourself and for your children. This does not mean to not have high standards…it merely means that sometimes good enough is good enough. (Bathroom story) Demanding perfection in ourselves or in our children results in a level of stress that in paralyzing. I often hear people say that when everything is just right, I will go back to school…..Iwill start to save money….Life is never perfect. Also make a value judgement. There are things worth “going to the mat for” and there are others where droppong it is the best answer. Learn to choose your battles early….that will serve you well in the teen years.
Take Care of yourself; Only if you take care of yourself, will you have the energy to take care of your children.. Build aliances with other parents. Look to your church for support and spiritual guidance as a parent. We are not meant to do everything ourselves. Take advantage of the resources that are available to you. You must take care of your healthin order to take care of your children. Raising healthy, confident, children who grow into balanced contributing adults takes love, energy, and stamina. It is a 24/7 job that can and will be the most frustrating jobat some times but will also be one of the most rewarding jobs you will ever do! Your gifts and delights will be proportional to time, and energy you give your most valuable asset….your children!
Conclusion: Remember: 1) Begin with the end in mind. 2) Give up perfection and 3) Take care of your self.
May 16th, 2008 at 6:41 pm This was terrific, and right on time for me. I was just thinking about this today. I want my daughter to grow up and value people more than things. Thanks for the confirmation…
May 19th, 2008 at 10:10 am Thank you Barbara….this was the outline I prepared for the speech…while the main points were made…the speech did not compare to the outline. Hopefully it was better! All that I read and believe is that all success is based upon relationships…good, honoring relationships.
May 22nd, 2008 at 3:46 pm This is a geat message. I will send this to my daughter as I think she will really learn from it. She is 35 and has a one year old daughter. Her career has been put on hold for the time being.